forgive them, to forgive u.

 

no one ever tells u dis: when u find dat bloody courage to forgive the person who hurt u, theres an unspoken second step dat often gets overlooked. after u've whispered "i forgive u" and tell them silently to fcuk off, after u've loosened the weight of their actions from ur chest, u’ll find urself sitting wit a heavier silence. it’s the silence of ur own heart, wondering if it can forgive u - for ignoring the red flags, for staying too long, for being so nice, for believin in the potential of someone who perhaps never saw ur fcukin worth the way u did theirs.

and dat’s the harder part, rite? the part where u hav to sit wit urself and reckon wit the version of u dat allowed it all to unfold. u replay the moments, tryin to make sense of y u stayed, y u din say no louder, y u gave more than u received and y u keep coming nack tho u've been treated like a piece of cold shyte. it’s a humbling and heavy moment, a tug-of-war between shame and self-compassion.

but i want u to knw dat, being hurt doesnt make u fcukin weak. it makes u human. letting someone in, even when it risks of breaking u, is a testament to ur capacity for love and hope. forgiveness doesnt jst set em free - it sets u free, too. free to forgive urself for not knwng better at the time, for learning the hard way, for being brave enuff to effin trust again; despite those bloody scars.

so, if ur feelin dis - take dis moment. sit wit the hurt. breathe thru the shame. and gently remind urself dat even when u got it wrong, u were still tryin ur best. 

forgive urself. u, deserve dat.